Do ya love me?

We’ve all had rough weeks. Frankly, by 3PM on Thursday I was ready to crawl inside a tequila bottle. I told myself, if I can just make it through Friday I will have definitely earned a tall stiff drink. Or 5.

However, Friday at 7 PM I realized we were out of desserp and this needed to be fixed, pronto. I also needed something really easy, because I was knowingly and willingly about to pull a BUI. (baking under the influence…)

I needed something simple, chocolatey, and easy. I had only one choice. BROWNIES! Not just any brownies. I call these, “The Old Greg“.

I use a base brownie recipe from Dorrie Greenspan’s Baking: From My Home To Yours.

"I've got the funk"

Mise En Place

1.5 bars (6 oz) of lindt chocolate (80-90%)

1/3 AP flour

1/2 tsp salt

3/4 C Sugar

5TBSP butter

Hershey’s “Irish Creme” kisses (quartered)

2 eggs (room temp)

1TBSP Bailey’s

1/4 tsp peppermint ext. & 1 tsp Vanilla extract

 

Unrelated: Katy Perry’s Last Friday Night has been stuck in my head for 3 days.

This really couldn’t be more simple. Trust me, I was like, 1.5 margaritas (for me, pretty much just tequila and lime…) deep at the time. Gather the flour & salt in a bowl. Put your sugar in a separate bowl on standby, and get your eggs, extracts, and Bailey’s ready to go too. Over a bain marie (double broiler) melt your chocolate and butter together. The reason I opt to go old school here (i.e. NOT in the microwave) is because we’re going to add eggs in here in a bit. The chocolate will melt slower AND cooler over the bain marie, therefore reducing the risk of me scrambling my eggs when I add them in.

While you’re melting, preheat your oven to 325. Now, once your chocolate and butter are melted, add in your sugar and mix until combined (it will be somewhat grainy, that’s ok). Take off of the bain marie and stir in your extracts and BAILEY’S (so beige and creameh!) and add in your eggs, one at a time, whisking constantly. (This is to avoid scrambled eggs in your BAILEYS brownies. Old Greg would not approve.)

 

"Have you ever drunk Bailey's from a shoe?"

Now, add in your flour and salt, stirring JUST until combined. Because I was making “Old Greg” brownies, and I found the shape of the quartered kisses appropriate, I dotted them on the top. Ordinarily, I’d say stir them into the batter and into your prepared 8×8 dish it goes for about 20 – 30 minutes.

For those of you NOT familiar with the “Old Greg” video… be forewarned. It’s silly, twisted, and full of “mangina” references. The perfect anecdote for someone who may or may not be BUI.

 

 

 

Ever notice how tequila makes nonsensical things relevant?

This is of course, the “Old Greg” as close as you can get without gettin’ your eyes wet.

 

I'm OLD GREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEG!

As you might imagine, I awoke in somewhat of a haze. And I was STARVING. Or so I thought. So I did what everyone else waking up on Saturday morning hungover would do. I baked blueberry muffins. With Gluten Free Bisquick. And I named them after the song that has been stuck in my head all week.

Behold: The Morning After…LAST FRIDAY NIGHT Muffins. Mise En Place:

 

"T.G.I...S?"

2 C Gluten Free Bisquick

1/2 C Sugar

1/4 tsp salt

zest of 1/2 lemon (optional)

1/4 C applesauce & vegetable oil each

1/4 C almond milk (or regular milk)

1/2 C Champagne (I had some leftover..) or soda water

1C fresh blueberries (+ more for tops)

2TBSP blueberry or blackberry jam

Sanding sugar (I had purple)

Muffins 101: Dry & Wet ingredients shall not meet until the very last second, be mixed only until combined, and dolloped into prepared (buttered) tins as quickly as humanly possible. Lumpy muffins are better than over mixed ones.

Mix your dry ingredients in a large bowl. Add your lemon zest and smash with a fork until fragrant. Then, gather your wet ingredients in a large measuring cup. Mix with a whisk until combined.

Put your blueberries in a microwave safe bowl with the 2 TBSP of blueberry or blackberry jam. Heat for about 30 seconds (just to melt the jam). Mix to coat.

Now, add your wet to the center of your dry, and fold (use spatula, not a whisk) until combined. Stir in your berries (they’ll stick together at first) and dollop using ice cream scoop into prepared tins.

NOTE: Gluten free items tend to be dense, and don’t rise quite as much as your non gluten free. I made mine with only 2 eggs, and should have added a 3rd. Also, you can fill the tins a little higher (3/4) of the way than the typical 2/3 of regular cupcakes/muffins.

 

ALMOST balanced breakfast, very important item missing...

I add a few blueberries to the top of each muffin before putting in the oven, just so I know everyone gets some berry goodness. Bake at 350 for about 7 minutes on bottom rack. Then take out, dust with sanding sugar, and continue to bake another 6 minutes or so on top rack.

These were AMAZING served warm with butter and blueberry jam. Seriously. I want to eat them every day of my life.

Now, in the picture to the right, a fellow hungover Saturday morning riser will notice something very important is missing from this otherwise well balanced breakfast…

Can you guess what it is?

 

It is very important to remember, The Morning After: LAST FRIDAY NIGHT

ALWAYS HYDRATE!

Hydrate, hydrate, HYDRATE!

***I happened to have gluten free Bisquick in my pantry. I buy a lot of gluten free items simply because the ingredient list is smaller, and void of HFCS or hydrogenated oils. I then had a family member diagnosed with Celiac’s, as did Dude. While I “dabble” in gluten free cooking, it’s important to remember that if you’re baking for someone with a food allergy to check EVERY ingredient added for any allergens. Since only Dude and myself were eating these, I wasn’t as meticulous as I’d have been were my aunt or Dude’s uncle (who both have a form of gluten intolerance) going to eat these. ***

 

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